It's been a while, my life has been a whirlwind since the last time I posted, the New Year really treated me to a multitude of shite all at once. Thanks Universe.
I had to deal with a break up, leaving a house and my Grandad passing away all in the space of a couple of weeks. Firstly, I was broken, didn't think I'd be able to cope. Then my Grandad passed away and as much as I fucking miss him and wish he was still here, it put life and everything into perspective.
I haven't let myself wallow, I haven't sat around crying like would be expected of me in this situation. It has been an awful time, but my God it's made me so much stronger.
Never, EVER in my life have I realised my self worth. Never have I wanted to get better mentally and physically. But all of this happened and some sort of switch turned on in my head. I realised I was worth so much more than the way I was treated, I realised that life is too short to sit around and suffer. I wanted to get better, I wanted to be well.
I've been enjoying myself since all of this happened, I'm the happiest I've been in such a long time and really, I am so proud of myself.
I finally realise that as a person I am worth love, kindness and attention from the people who I want to give attention and love back to. I'm so happy for myself.
I have realised I am worth more than my eating disorder, more than my anxiety and more than my depression. I've been eating whatever I wanted (of course with the off days, normal in recovery) - I've been going out and having fun, spending time with some lovely people and treating myself to nice things. This is the nicest I've felt in so long, I am finally ready to live my life.
I'm now weighing up my options about the future, I'm looking into going back to University with people behind me who support me and want me to succeed. I am in a really good place.
Basically, know your worth guys. Just know that you are worth love, happiness and good health. Look after yourself and get rid of toxic people who bring you down, life is TOO SHORT PEOPLE. You are worth all of those days where you treat yourself to nice things, you are worth the time you spend on yourself and only yourself, you are worth self love and self respect, you are worth the respect you deserve from other people. You are just fucking amazing and embrace it.
I'll be back soon with regular posts, I just need some well earned me time!
Hey everyone! It's been a wonderful, cold, rainy day - my fave. I'm sat in my cosy house and came across an Autumn tag on Twitter that another blogger had done and thought I would do it for you to embrace the Autumn. I'm calling everything I do related to Autumn, my Autumn rain dance. IT'S COMING, IT'S COMING.
Do enjoy!
1. Drinks - What's your favourite seasonal drink from Starbucks?
I really do enjoy a Pumpkin Spice Latte at this time of year, it's just natural. Although, in Ireland we ordered a Pumpkin Spice Frapp - they did not blend this, it was just an iced Latte. It was wanl.
2. Accessories - What do you option for? Scarf, boots, gloves?
Black. My accessory is black. HAHA, oh my god no I really need to branch out this Autumn and get some cute little autumnal colours in my wardrobe. I need a nice mustard scarf, some dark red gloves, etc, etc. I'll have a look round, perhaps even do an Autumn wish list...
3. Music - What's your favourite music to listen to during Autumn?
During Autumn? My music taste does not tend to change with the seasons, but I'm currently obsessed with The 1975s album which I have been for months. I'm sure it'll make me feel 100x more dramatic when it's cold and windy.
4. Perfume - What's your favourite scent for this time of year?
Apple and cinnamon at this time of year is a bloody winner, holy moly. I cannot wait to go out and get some candles and sprays for the house in this scent! Back home at my mums she would always by an air freshener in that scent and it would just smell like home. It would smell cosy and I used to love coming home from school/work because it just felt warm with that smell.
5. Candles - What scents will you be burning this season?
As previously stated I'm going to go shopping for some cinnamon scented candles shortly!
6. What do you love most about Autumn?
I love the cosiness of the cold evenings. I'm strange and I would take cold, windy weather over the sun anyday. (Hello, I have a tattoo of an umbrella and rain) ((I might even get an autumnal leaf shortly, watch me)) I love the colours of the leaves, the crisp morning walks, the warmth of your house when the lights are out and it's just your lamps on. The blankets, the slippers and the cosy pyjamas. Waiting for Halloween knowing Christmas is just around the corner!
7. Make up - Favourite makeup look?
Okay, so you know me I don't wear too much make up! But I really have been looking at so many bloggers/instas and see some adorable looks. I'd never be able to pull them off but I can admire from afar. Perhaps I will, but I'll probably stick with my normal look. I woke up like this.
8. What are you looking forward the most in Autumn?
I want to make our new home look sweet and Autumn-ey. I want to buy and carve pumpkins with Ry again this year because last year was the first time I've ever done it. I can't wait to take my little dog out for Autumn walks over the park when I go to visit my mum, walks up the lane to work in the rain. Cosy evenings in with warm drinks and blankets! AGH BRING IT TO ME.
I hope you've enjoyed this, if you do the tag let me know I'd love to read your Autumn faves!
As you know I have recently moved out, 4 weeks today to be exact! It's a massive thing, like I've left my mum and dad and abandoned my dogs. It's not quite that dramatic I just fuckin' miss my dogs. Anyway, it's huge and there's some things you should prepare for before you make the big step so I thought I'd stick my little nose in and help a bit! Here's some tips, enjoy!
Discuss (relevant if you're moving out with another person):
Make sure you're on the same page and it is what you both want. Moving out is HUGE, you're about to share your entire life with someone else make sure it's what you want and what they want. Make sure you're willing to share your items, your mentality and your annoying habits with another human lollllzzzzzz.
Look at your money and future bills:
Prep in this area is key, work out what you earn monthly and the bills that need to go out (council tax, gas, electric, water, to license, television and Internet, food, petrol, mobile phones, etc, etc) ((FYI, it's a fuck tonne)) - make sure you have money to spare? Luckily we worked out that we can live comfortably and enjoy our money so sorting this out is so important to know what the future can hold for you.
To get a joint account or to not get a joint account:
For me and my boyfriend it was so much easier to go this way. We did this months ago before we were even in the house because it was simply easier to save. If you trust the other person and are happy to share even this part of your life then go for it. This takes me on to the next point....
SAVE:
Save everything you can, it's better to have more than not enough. We started saving in around November last year and we may have used some of that money for leisurely things like holidays but we also had enough when we had planned to move out (August) and everything went to plan! Just every month put a bit away and it all adds up and is actually such a great feeling to know you've got all of this money together yourself.
Buy in advance:
All the little bits and pieces you need for you house actually turns into a lot of bloody stuff. You forget about a sieve but who knew a sieve was actually really necessary?! Get together lots of bits, look in sales and whenever you go to a shop just pick something up! It all adds up and you'll move into your new home as prepared as you can be! Although you'll find that you're missing something as soon as you need it. I recommend supermarkets for home stuff more than anywhere else!
Do not rush:
There's no need to rush, make sure you're ready to fly the nest, to leave your mothers womb and cut the umbilical cord. It's huge, it's emotional and sometimes lonely. It is what you make it and if you're ready it'll be one of the best times of your life.
File stuff:
Buy a big file from Staples or any other stationary store and put all of your bills/important documents in there. You're going to get a lot! So whenever you need to they are easily accessible and you won't get in a mare on the phone to the gas man.
To rent or not to rent:
Are you in a stable position financially? Do you see yourself in that house for the next 10 years? No? Then rent. Where's the harm in starting off small and building up as you get older and wiser. I'm so happy we've decided to rent, no way on this earth would I get a mortgage wrapped around my neck at this age. I want to see houses and move and see new places, I'll get a mortgage when I'm fully financially stable and have a family! Although this is personal preference completely but it's a fucking huge decision that only you can make.
Don't nag each other:
Did he not wash up properly? Did he not clean the toilet? Don't bite his head off. (This is a personal message to me) it'll all fall into place! You've brought your habits from one home to another, it'll take time to get used to one another's company constantly. We've been here 4 weeks and I'm learning new things about my lad every day, and sometimes I want to rip my head off but I love his ways.
And that's that for todays post, have you seen my new layout?! Holy moly, I feel all grown up now lads.
So something that has really been bothering me recently is the difference in how mental illnesses are treated in comparison with physical. I personally, feel like I'm just being silly and weak if I need time for myself because everything is getting too much but my Eating Practitioner said to me "would you feel the same if you had a broken leg?" - of course not, I'd be laying on that sofa watching crap day time telly with no guilt whatsoever.
I've had a few moments recently where I physically cannot face the world, I can only face a few and that's my family, Ryan and my best friend Ben. Everyone else I can't stand the thought of socialising with and that is tough. It's tough especially when you have a full time job and are saving to move out so every time you need to get out of it all you feel like you're letting everyone down.
But it's true, if it was a physical illness the guilt just isn't there. No one can see truly how you feel sometimes though, sometimes getting up out of bed is the biggest struggle you'll face that day and isn't that just sad? Something so normal to everyone else is so hard to you that day. I know it's become a frequent occurrence recently and it makes me feel lazy and weak and I hate that.
In reality I know I'm not weak, I'm ill and sometimes I honestly forget that my own mental health is actually an illness because the stigma still stands. My mental health affects me so much more than I'd like to admit, or wish that it did. I feel so physically ill on days because of it and I'm struggling to understand it lately even though it has been going on for so many years.
I'm trying to figure out why and how all of this started, maybe when I get there it will finally all come to an end. I'm just lucky that right now I'm being treated by the best team I've ever had and I'm praising the mental health system for the first time in 10 years.
Really, what I want to say to anyone who feels the same is that it IS okay to need some time out. If your mental health is really taking over so much, take a step back and remember what you're fighting for. Look after yourself, watch some shite telly and eat some comfort food - look after you for once. Your mind is just as important as a broken leg, a sore throat, or a headache so take it easy.
So last week I had a day off and wanted some time for myself, as you know I love autumn and I thought I might as well embrace it and go on a long walk. I walked all the way from my halls to Westminster, along the South Bank and Westminster Bridge and everything…I can't say that was the most fun I've ever had as I was dodging tourists left, right and centre. I can now understand a typical Londoners anger at the everyday tourist, it is quite infuriating but we've all done it and I'm a small person so I could swiftly dodge being in the background of someones Big Ben selfie. However, I got to Parliament Square and I was like nope, I must get on the tube this is too much because it had started to rain and I was tempted to just tube back to where I'd come from (not Suffolk, although if that was possible I probably would have).
From there I got on the circle line and went to one of my favourite places that holds many memories in London - High Street Kensington. Oh, the memories there (mostly 5 Seconds of Summer related, oops) but it made me really happy and nostalgic to be there. I walked to Starbucks for the first time on my own and got a PSL to add to my autumnal day and then walked along the high street to my other favourite place in London which is Kensington Gardens. OHHH I LOVE IT THERE. Immediately walking through the gates I felt relaxed, surrounded by leaves and trees and it was just super calm.
I've noticed that in London everyone seems to have super cute dogs and I'm really angry about it, but a good angry because I just wish it was me who had the cute dog but I'm also okay with just looking at the cute dog…is that weird? That sounds really weird.
But anyway, I continued to walk through Kensington Gardens, got a big lost, got tempted to leave but wanted to carry on to the Hyde Park side and that's what I did. I got greeted by even more prettiness, even more little dogs and the sight of London on the other side of the park so I knew what direction I was going in.
It was just so relaxing, I'd love to go for these kinda walks with other people but it was world mental health day so I wanted to spend it doing something relaxing and peaceful for myself as a day like that would obviously be close to my heart.
By the time I'd got out of the park and was at Hyde Park corner I was not okay, I'd been walking for what seemed like forever but it was only an hour or so. I then went and visited old Liz, they didn't let me in for tea though which of course was extremely disappointing, I thought we were pals.
Once again I was a little bit lost but found my way and was once again at Westminster, but nope I definitely was done by that point and could not handle the thought of more tourists in my face and men on the bridge doing weird magic tricks but they were obviously just mugging people off. So yeah, I was lazy and got on a tube. When I got in I calculated that I had walked almost 5 miles and I was pretty pleased. I'd spent a couple of hours just walking across London, earphones in and all by myself. It really was quite lovely.
It's been a week since the last day of Reading Festival and I was going to make this post during the week but in all honesty I've just felt way too run down, anxious and weird to thing straight let alone write a blog post. I still don't feel great, potentially even worse because the stress of leaving home in just a week is really getting me down but I've got to power through and tell you all about my weekend at Reading which was the BEST weekend. This could be a long one, stick with me you might enjoy it! I'll do it by the days so it'll be broken down, okay? Okay, let's go.
Wednesday -
Me and my friend Corinna travelled to Reading so we could into the camp site early on Thursday morning, as we had learned from last year (you can kinda read about that and what you should/shouldn't do at festivals in a previous post here) and I was being a super stressy arse and I was convinced Corinna was close to strangling me, I don't blame her! I tried chilli cheese bites from Burger King and well, they were just beauts but that's pretty irrelevant to my Reading experience, ANYWAY. We got to an awful Travelodge in Reading for the evening and then went to get some alcohol for the weekend, the Tescos at Reading was rammed with teens buying alcohol and such, aisles were replaced with bottles of vodka - quite funny really. Then we just went back to the hotel and I hit my head twice on a low ceiling which filled me with anxiety all night so I didn't sleep and watched teleshopping from 3am…great night for me.
Thursday -
We woke up at 6am and got ready, had one last beloved shower and met our friends before going into the campsite to set up. After waiting in the dreaded queue to actually even get in we walked for a while and met up with some other people who had already got a spot for us, the whole thing was flowing so much nicer than last year and it was SO refreshing. The stress of last year was kinda traumatising so it was just so nice for to all go so easily. We set up, went and got some food for the weekend from Tesco and then just bummed about all day, I can't really remember what we even did all day. I know we got offered balloons about 3 times, but not the nice kind of balloons…so I politely declined.
Friday -
The festival had truly begun! On the line up today was one of my favourite bands from years ago - PARAMORE. I was so stoked because Hayley Williams is like the Queen of pop punk, I wanted to just bow down to her. We had a few drinks at the tent, met up with some of Corinnas friends and then we went to the main stage to watch Enter Shikari and then Paramore and it was just so sick. Enter Shikari are a band I used to love a lot as well so it was so cool to finally see them properly after briefly seeing them last year at Warped Tour. Paramore had some technical difficulties but powered through when they sung The Only Exception, it was just Hayley and us, the audience. I honestly welled up a few times because 1) it was just so fricken cute and 2) I'd loved this band a lot when I was younger and I still did and I was finally seeing them and music really just makes me quite emotional in general.
If you went to Reading this year let's talk about the freezing cold nights, WHAT WAS THE DEAL WITH THEM!? I literally used socks for gloves it was ridiculous.
Oh we also drunkenly watched a comedian and went on the Waltz and they were both very strange experiences when you're a bit merry…
Saturday -
Everyone I was camping with went to see Die Antwoord and well, that was a damn experience and a half. If I'm honest, they kinda freak me out but it was actually so fun to see them because everyone was just partying hard it was so funny. We also saw Chvrchs and they were super chilled so that was cool. Then in the evening we saw Arctic Monkeys, a band I absolutely adore and it was ace to see them again after not seeing them for a couple of years! They played a lot of songs from their recent album 'AM' and if I'm honest it's really not my favourite album at all, I much prefer their others so it was kinda just a really chilled set to me. Alex Turner made Corinna and I swoon to no end, he is just something else. He is such a cocky shit, I LOVE IT.
Sunday -
The final day, cue the tears please. I was so looking forward to this day because there were so many bands I wanted to see, we literally spent all day in the arena which is something we'd never done before but I didn't know that this day was about to be one of the best days of my whole life!
I really wanted to see Tonight Alive but I was too tired to move in the morning, it was kinda pathetic. But then we went to see Papa Roach and they're a bit older now, but still knew how to rock a crowd for sure. We just sat at the main stage and watched these bands and it was so chilled and cool, we also watched Sleeping with Sirens and A Day To Remember and they were SO good.
THIS IS WHERE IT GETS EXCITING. After that we were just walking around and three people approached me, I thought they were like Reading fest security so I just didn't really know what they were doing but they said to me "we see from your t-shirt that you're a Blink 182 fan?" I responded as you would expect, because hello…I was wearing a Blink top. They went on to say "how big of a fan are you?" I didn't want to big myself up and say I was the biggest fan on Earth in case they asked me like a super awkward question so I just said "fairly" and at this point I was super confused, then the man said to me "well, if you can make your way to the guest area at 7pm then you'll be meeting the band, we're from Radio 1" AND THAT'S WHEN THE WORLD STOPPED BECAUSE IT WAS THE MOST AMAZING NEWS I'D EVER HEARD IN MY LIFE. Me and Corinna were meeting one of the biggest bands on Earth, what the actual shit?! I still can't even believe they approached me, I'm usually not lucky at all but someone wanted me to have a sick day!
We met them, no pictures were allowed, it was just a signing and I was kinda just lost for words because THEY ARE BLINK. They were so cool and American and I was just not okay, simply not okay. I was stood in front of Mark Hoppus thinking, what do I even say to a man like this?! He's a damn legend in my eyes and I was just done, could not think of what to even do. They were all so cool and it ended so quickly but I MET THEM, AGH. Absolutely amazing and I'm so grateful that the people from Radio 1 came up to me because it made my weekend just that little bit more amazing!
After that we watched The 1975 who were so fricken good, Matty is a really good front man I have to say. Then it was time for Blink and I was so tired I couldn't go as nuts as I'd liked but I was still seeing my favourite band and that's really all that mattered! The set list ruled and it honestly topped off one of the best days of my whole life!
The whole weekend was just awesome, definitely pissed all over last year. I consumed many bacon rolls, took on the disgusting toilets, was surrounded by the annoying shouting of 'ALAN' and 'STEVE' and it was just the best weekend.
Well done universe, you done be proud that weekend. It's gonna be tough to beat a weekend like that now!
When I first started this blog my main aim was for it to be focused on celebrities and the showbiz industry, boreeeeee. That was my chosen career path from a young age, however, in the past year or so my views have changed and I'm not really sure where I want to take the degree I'll be doing anymore. I'd love to be on television, sure. I'd love to be writing in magazines and such, but I would never want to write a scandal about someones life, you know?
If you read my blog you might have noticed that I haven't posted anything along those lines in months, I will always continue to write about music but a celebrities life and one which is just pretty irrelevant just doesn't appeal to me anymore and I would much rather write about something totally and utterly boring in my life than that. The 'celebrity' world is so widely covered I just don't feel like my future lies in writing about that kind of stuff anymore.
I have however been writing a lot more about life haven't I. Right now my main priority is focusing on life, changes in life and improving my own life. Which is why I want to start a new weekly thing on my blog.
This new segment shall be called 'Positive Tuesdays' because I feel this could help not only me, but maybe you too? In this I want to just be positive, no negativity, I want you to tell me one positive thing that has happened in the past week and I will write one (or maybe more, it might have been an ace week) positive thing and we will all delve into a positive, beautiful life together. HOW CUTE OF ME.
You know what, I've been totally failed by a trustworthy system so I'm having to rely on myself and my family and friends to get better. To get out of a rut that I've been thrown into by my own mind and the only way I can get out of it is to be productive and this seems like a good way for me. I'm excited, I hope this helps others too.
This could be really sweet and I hope you'll join me on this little journey of positivity, see you tomorrow pals!
A few weeks ago I finally plucked up the courage to get permanent ink on my skin, you know…it's literally never coming off. For about a year and a half I'd had these tattoo ideas and after much stressing and sweating I finally got them done. For one thing, the pain is literally not bad at all and that's what I was worried about most, palms were sweaty, knees weak, arms were heavy (thank you, Eminem). But I don't think many people apart from my pals know exactly why I got what I got, so I'm going to tell you whether you like it or not, whether you really give two shits or not, YOU'RE GOING TO KNOW.
Firstly, the tattoo on the side of my wrist…
(I took these photos when it was first done, I can't seem to get a good one right now and I can't put myself through the stress of taking a good one, IT'S STRESSING ME OUT, MAN) Okay, so I was originally going to get three generic hearts, one for my mum, one for my dad and one for my brother. Then I was like, no I want them to mean more to me than just that! So I got them all to draw a heart each, it goes my mum, dad and then my brother at the bottom. They aren't the neatest things in the world but I don't care one little bit, they drew them and I'll always have a tiny little piece of them literally on me forever and I love that! They could've turned out looking like acorns or something but they didn't, they look like hearts and that's good enough for me. I just wanted them to do something for me because my family are my life, any little thing like this just makes me feel all warm inside. Cute, I'm cute as frick. Secondly, the tattoo on my inner forearm…
Do you recognise these lyrics? Maybe. They're from 'Beside You' by 5 Seconds of Summer. Now I didn't get this tattoo for the purpose of 5SOS, they might be my favourite band but I just wouldn't personally get a tattoo dedicated to a band. Back in January/February last year this song was the first I heard by them and immediately this lyric stuck out, I didn't really know who they were at this point so for me to immediately be like "I WANT THIS LYRIC ON MY BODY" means it must've meant a lot, right? Yes it does! 'My heart wants to come home' for me this means that wherever I am in the world my heart will always hold a special place for home, my family and everything about where I'm from. I'm leaving for University and you know I'll look down at my arm whenever I'm missing home, my heart might want to be home but I'll be living my dream, but everyone will know that home has such a special place in my heart. I must thank 5 Seconds of Summer for creating one of the most beautiful lyrics to come into my life. And I absolutely dig the font I chose, it's like a broken typewriter font and I love it so much.
I still look at my arm and I'm like wow, man, I've got two fricken cute tattoos on me forever with lovely meanings and I really love them so much.
Hiiiiii, I found this TMI tag and I fancied doing it as a way of introducing myself to any new followers I have gained - thank you by the way if you've followed me on BlogLovin, it really means a lot to me when people recognise you and what you're writing! Let's get started...
1: What are you wearing?
This is embarrassing to admit as I'm not wearing some fancy, fashionable clothing. I am however in my pyjamas which is an odd mix of cut off pyjama trousers which I made into shorts and a green Linkin Park t-shirt.
2: Ever been in love?
Maybe, I'm not sure. I've only been in two relationships and sometimes I wonder if they ever even count. One of the boys I held onto the thought of him long after, maybe that was love…I'm not sure, probably not.
3: Ever had a terrible breakup?
No, not really!
4: How tall are you?
5'2/5'3 (I'm not sure)
5: How much do you weigh?
How much do YOU weigh Mr Nosey?!
6: Any tattoos?
Yes, 2! But I'm going to be making a post about them soon so keep an eye out for that!
7: Any piercings?
Nope!
8: OTP?
This is a tough one, Gus and Hazel are beautiful and everyone loves them, they are the true OTP.
9: Favorite show?
How I Met Your Mother/Friends.
10: Favorite bands?
5 Seconds of Summer, Blink 182, All Time Low, McFly, The Vamps.
11: Something you miss?
Someone, not something…my lovely Grandad Bill.
12: Favorite song?
Beside You - 5 Seconds of Summer.
13: How old are you?
19, I'm pulling a sad face right now.
14: Zodiac sign?
Cancer.
15: Quality you look for in a partner?
If you can make me laugh then I will fall for you.
16: Favorite Quote?
'My heart wants to come home' - it's from a song but still.
17: Favorite actor?
JASON SEGEL, NEXT QUESTION PLEASE.
18: Favorite color?
Red or purple or white or black.
19: Loud music or soft?
Both.
20: Where do you go when you’re sad?
Into my room where I sit for a little while and collect my thoughts or have a nap.
21: How long does it take you to shower?
Usually I time it with how many songs I listen to and it's usually two, so about 7 minutes.
22: How long does it take you to get ready in the morning?
Not long at all because I am lazy and make minimal effort with my appearance and I've mastered the art of straightening hair in less than 8 minutes.
23: Ever been in a physical fight?
I was play fighting with my brother and my cousin once and I punched my brother in the nose if that counts, I hope it counts because it was a proud moment that me, little Shannon had just whacked someone in the snout.
24: Turn on?
Tall, funny boys. GAH.
25: Turn off?
Long finger nails, pass the bucket because I will vom.
26: Fears?
I could be here all day with that. Death, illness, falling between the train and the platform, failure and onions.
27: Last thing that made you cry?
Probably just myself.
28: Last time you said you loved someone?
10 minutes ago when my mum went to bed!
29: Last book you read?
I started reading Eleanor & Park but I stopped because it was getting too cute and I wasn't in the mood for cuteness so I stopped and haven't returned, but fully it was The Fault in Our Stars.
30: Last show you watched?
Big Brother, hahaha.
31: Last person you talked to?
My mum.
32: The relationship between you and the person you last texted?
He is my dad. (I'm so popular, speaking to my mum, texting my dad, who needs pals?!)
33: Favorite food?
Hey, health heads look away now - PIZZA.
34: Place you want to visit?
Australia, so badly it hurts.
35: Last time you kissed someone?
Last year some time and it sucked. HAHAH (sorry, if you read this I'm sorry.)
36: Last time you were insulted?
This evening when I tried McDonalds new cheese bites, they were awful and I'm extremely insulted.
37: Last sport you played?
Does Sims 3 count as a sport?
38: Last time you hung out with anyone?
Tonight with my friend Shanice!
39: Who should answer these questions next?
Anyone, you, your mother, your dog or even your loaf of bread.
I hope you enjoyed reading about me as much as I enjoyed writing about myself. (That was a joke, I'm not self centred I promise) I deleted a few though because they were YouTubery related questions and I'm not on that level yet!
Have a nice day wherever you are, doing whatever you're doing!
I'm not sure what really triggered this thought but isn't it strange how when were little we didn't properly understand the concept of time, we didn't see things as being months and months away, or days away, we probably just took every day as it came and every day just felt the same.
You would spend 6 weeks in the summer off school and when you're little it feels like an eternity, you'd spend it playing in your bedroom and it would be the best time. Then you grow up and time starts to feel more and more precious, days start to pass quickly, quicker than even months felt when we were younger.
Time is a very strange concept and it's horrible to waste it really. Let's all return to the mentality we once had, make the good times feel like they're lasting forever because that's just really nice.
(I've been posting quite a lot recently about life and all that, life is just all that's on my mind really and how I must learn to treasure it and that's exactly what I am doing)
Valentines day is approaching, I'm 18 years old and I am yet to spend a Valentines Day with a boy so to me the whole point is overrated and weird, but I'm sure that would be different if I wasn't a future, lonely dog lady - please God, I pray that doesn't happen…like seriously, please do not let that happen!
I'm sure there are many of you out there who are in the same boat as me, the 14th February comes along and you're on your tod just sat in your house while romantic couples around the world are sharing their love with each other over a candlelit meal at some restaurant they would probably never go to on any other day. BUT US? WHAT CAN WE POSSIBLY DO ON SUCH A DAY?! Well, here are some Valentines Day alternatives for those who are just 'waiting for the right one'.
You could order a massive pizza and just eat it all on your own because who needs a boyfriend/girlfriend when there is pizza in the world? Pizza is the next best thing to romance, possibly even THE best thing full stop. We could just stuff our faces and perhaps an hour or so later we could cry about the fact we are alone and not only alone, but full of pizza and not full of love.
On the topic of the worlds beloved pizza, instead of taking pictures with your loved one on Valentines Day you could just make edits of the Pizza Hut logo with the Bleach London app, because who needs to make cute faces and look all loved up when you could spend your valuable time doing pointless stuff like this?!
Or we could go on a nice walk and clear our minds of all the negativity and remember that one day we might even spend a walk on Valentines Day with someone we love - but not this one, because we are ALONE.
If you're me you could celebrate that on Valentines Day it has been one whole year since Luke Hemmings from 5 Seconds Of Summer followed you on Twitter, because that's better than any real relationship am I right ladies, am I right?! (No, no I am not right.)
Maybe we could just lay on the floor and cry, I mean that sounds like fun doesn't it?
In all seriousness we could just treat it as any other day, but all of the above sound a lot more appealing. Let us embrace the loneliness.
Happy soon to be Valentines Day everyone, HEY it's like 24 days away, that's still quite a lot of time to find someone? HA NO, not really. We will probably still be as alone as we are right now. HAVE A GOOD ONE!
p.s. follow me if you'd like and on bloglovin too! the link is on my page, thanks! x
2013 was a crazy as hell year, we saw Miley Cyrus and her tongue many, MANY times, McBusted became a thing, Robin Thicke was very creepy, a future king was born and One Direction continued to take over the world. But that's all well and good, I could talk about all them points but you've been hearing about them all year long!
2013 for me? It was the best year of my life as you can read about in my last post! This year started off really bad, I had a bad spell of anxiety from Christmas day 2012 right through to about April and I hit many lows during that time, visited counsellors and all sorts and even though I was doing fun things in that time I just couldn't fight the sadness and hard times my mind was putting me through.
As the year went on I just hit a point and that's when I started to help myself, bring myself out of the depression and anxiety and learned how to be happy.
When you have depression and things like that then it just seems physically and mentally impossible to be happy, no matter what there is no getting out of it - or so it seems. But I learnt how to push away negative thoughts, I learnt how to turn negatives into positives, I LEARNT HOW TO BE HAPPY FOR NO REASON. That's the best thing, just going to bed one day thinking 'I don't want to be like this anymore' and waking up the next day with a completely different mind set. I never thought it would happen because I was so stuck in this massive pile of anxiousness and sadness but it did happen.
Sure, I still have days when I want to turn into Patrick Star from Spongebob and just live under a rock but then I remember that it won't last forever and that tomorrow is another day, I just taught myself how to look forward to the future. I don't know what will happen in the future? But I can just hope that something good will happen and look forward to that! I could sit around and be sad that I don't have a job but I know that in a few months I'll be going to university so that's not really a problem right now. I could be sad that I don't have a boyfriend but that's not the end of the world, I'm only 18. These are the things that have to be put into perspective and they are what I've learned from.
If I can learn to be happy then anyone can, anyone can get out of the horrible ruts of mental illnesses and get better - IT IS POSSIBLE. Anything is possible. Just a little bit of positivity, motivation, support and a lot of self belief and you can do anything you want to do.
I plan to post a lot more in the new year and hopefully my blog will take off!
Hello! It's been a while since I posted but once again I've just had a lack of motivation to post on here but as soon as 2014 comes I will be back, for sure!
It is nearly Christmas which means it is almost the new year, last year I did a few of my personal highlights but this year has been so good there is no way I could put it down to a top 10 so I'm just going to go through each month - this is mainly for me to look back on and remember how good this year was for me despite the large amount of lows I had too, let's get on with it!
-JANUARY- Liam Payne followed me on twitter - This was the one thing that just started the year off for me, never did I think that would happen! I was just sat in the car as he was doing a follow spree and I'm not about that spamming life so I just kept following and unfollowing him and finally gave up, a few minutes later I looked on my phone to see 'Liam Payne followed you' - I thought it was a fake account but it wasn't and you would think a follow is nothing but my hyperventilating proved that maybe it was something special!
Discovered 5 Seconds Of Summer - little did I know how much of an influence they would have on this year being amazing.
-FEBRUARY-
Luke Hemmings followed - although I did not react the same way as Liam because to me 5sos are very normal boys, it was just quite nice before they got v famo. (He only had 47k now he has over a million followers, crazy).
Take Me Home Tour round 1 - you can read all about that here!
Other little good bits from February include getting a tweet from Ashton Irwin but like I said, to me they are just normal boys it's like talking to a pal. Although this was not a 'highlight' it's stuck in my mind because I was freezing cold and I thought my toes were going to fall off - waiting to meet Little Mix, failed miserably, not a good day at all.
-MARCH-
March was a good month for Twitter for me, 5SOS band account had followed and tweeted me and Michael Clifford followed me after I was sending him funny tweets in a desperate plea for him to follow me, but did I even leave my house that month?
-APRIL-
Take Me Home Tour round 2 - this was INSANE, I was 6th row with my friend India and it was just crazy and it was so fun, I was so grateful for the seats I had because you feel at the heart of it all - just amazing.
3 Calum Hood tweets and followed - he properly cheered me up that month he was so lovely and it was all in the space of like a week, I was like 'are we pals yet?'.
Final Take Me Home date (round 3) - this was my final TMH tour date and I was sat right up the top of the O2 it was so weird going from being 6th row a few days before but in a way it was so amazing to watch the crowd below and around me sing along to every song and I definitely welled up a lot, especially during Little Things because the crowd looked beautiful so I can imagine how it feels to be One Direction seeing that kind of reaction every single night.
5SOS London Acoustic & meeting them - this was 5 Seconds Of Summers first acoustic show in the UK and it was so intimate and nice and then we got to meet them after and I was nervous but I have no idea why because as I've said before, they're just normal boys! They were all really lovely and it left me super happy although my pictures did not, they were not very good.
Other good moments of April were being interacted with even further by 5sos on Twitter, it made me realise what nice guys they are and how much time they put into their fans by interacting with their fans all the time.
-MAY-
My brother got engaged! - this was a BIG moment of the year even though I always forget he is even engaged but I can't wait for him and my future sister-in-law (that feels weird to type) to get married!
5SOS London show - as always it was nice to see them live, they always put on good shows and it was the last show before they went back to Australia before they started the American leg of the TMH tour with One Direction, but the show was awesome and is a definite highlight of the year!
This month was the last month of this year that I actually got interacted with by 5 Second Of Summer, but that just goes to show how much harder it is to get noticed because they're getting so big and popular and I am proud of them, they've come very far this year!
-JUNE-
Left Sixth Form - yup, I did all of my A-Level exams and left education and that was just really weird.
Also this month we drove to our friends house and put a cheeseburger and chips on our friends car and just drove off, it was such a random thing to do but we still speak about it because at the time it was so funny BUT YOU HAD TO BE THERE - it was one of those moments.
-JULY-
My 18th Birthday - This was a day I had been dreading because growing up scares me so much! But it was a really good birthday as all my life I have wanted an Apple Macbook and I got one and I was just so grateful, it became like my child that day. I was surrounded by family and that makes any birthday good for me! Although my mum and dad put up pictures of me all around the estate with 'Happy 18th Shannon', I was kind of fuming to be honest and I might have ripped one or two down.
McFly at Stratford - STRESSFUL DAY. Me and my friend Libby went to Ipswich train station and stood there for about 4 hours because the lines were all shut as a man was stood on the roof of the station and it was such a bad start to the day but in the end we managed to finally get to stratford and were at the front to watch McFly and they proved to me why they had been my favourite band for 10 years! But they got cut off and Danny chucked his microphone into the crowd and I kinda wish I had been hit by it BECAUSE THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN A STORY TO TELL?
-AUGUST-
A Level results & getting into university - So all year I had been putting the idea of university out of my head because I just knew I wouldn't get in but on results day I went onto UCAS and saw that I had been accepted into my firm and insurance and all I could do was cry because I wasn't expecting it, I didn't even get the grades to get in so I don't know how I managed it. For days after I was just crying because I didn't know what to do but I then chose to defer and I'm now super looking forward to starting uni in September 2014!
One Direction This Is Us Premiere - We went down to Leicester Square on a Monday afternoon and that was going to be our home for the night, we slept on the ground, I fell over, I paid 20p a time to use the toilets, WHAT A NIGHT. The next day came around and we went into the orange pen and I was so pumped up like I thought this would be my moment to meet one direction but nope, it was definitely not because when you're around crazy One Direction fans you just have no chance, I am still bitter about this day. I was so close to finally meeting them, when I say so close I mean centimetres away from them and all I came out with was bad selfies of me and the back of their heads. You can watch my time at the premiere in this video! Danny Jones was a complete legend that day.
Reading Festival - One of the best weekends of my life, let alone year! Despite the disgusting smell of the toilets, the trek to find a place for our tent which left me wanting to just fall into the ground, not having a shower for a few days, people falling on our tent and having me on edge all night; it was the greatest weekend without a doubt. The line up of artists wasn't my favourite but it was so good so that doesn't matter. I got very merry during Green Day and that night will stay with me forever. I cannot wait for Reading 2014, bring on Blink 182 GAAAH.
-SEPTEMBER-
McFly RAH 10 Year Anniversary shows - you can read about my day here! and watch the video below!
This month was the month my friends all went away for University and it changed the whole last few months of the year, it's been weirder than I thought it would be but I still love them as much as I did before they left. It makes you appreciate your friendships even more than you already did!
-OCTOBER-
Road trip to Sheffield & Birmingham - Me and a few of my friends went up to Sheffield and Birmingham to visit our friends at their universities and it was so cool to experience 'uni life' for a couple of days, it gave me a little bit of a taste of what the fun part of university is like so I'm just that tiny bit more prepared for next year. It was super fun and met some nice people!
-NOVEMBER-
AKA THE BEST MONTH OF THIS WHOLE YEAR.
McBusted announced their tour - This was not only one of my highlights of the year but it has also been one of the biggest talking points of the year, they've sold out so many shows and are constantly adding more dates and I was lucky enough to get tickets and I cannot wait!
Welcomed 5SOS back to the UK - We went to the airport to welcome them back and it was so weird seeing how many people turned up to do the same thing, it is just so weird to see their fanbase and their popularity growing right in front of me.
Met 5 Seconds Of Summer many times! - The ultimate highlight of my whole year was this, it was just the best month because I got to see my favourite people 3 out of 4 weekends in November and actually got to have conversations with them which is all I've wanted all year because to me they're just similar teenagers to me, they like and do the same things...well I don't tour the world and I'm not in a band, but you know! It was so cool to go to Warped Tour with my friend Libby and just see them strolling around and being normal people because that is what I like to see, although I didn't bother them until we were outside and so were they, I wouldn't have wanted to disturb them inside, me and my friend enjoyed the music as did they. I've wanted to go to Warped Tour almost all my life because it just sounds so awesome and it was and to speak to my favourite band after just topped it all off, it was seriously the best month just being able to meet the people that make me happiest when days are rough.
5SOS Koko Shows - 2 nights in a row I saw them put on yet more amazing shows, the set list was just awesome and to see Luke sing a song all on his own and just watch the crowd sing it back to him was beautiful. The 2nd night we queued all day in hope of getting near the front and I was until some crazy people in the crowd were making it go mental during the support act which meant I went to the back but we had a sick time just having a little party by ourselves at the back and watching the boys do their thing on stage!
That month I also met Dougie Poynter and that was quite nice to see him, the last time I met him was 2010 so it was a long time coming!
-DECEMBER-
Not much has happened this month but I hope to have a lovely Christmas with my family and a great new year.
This post was for me more than anything but if you liked it then follow on here and bloglovin if you'd like!
Wishing you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!
