Hiiiiiii!
Here I am sat on my bed, 11 months after my year out from education begun and I'm reflecting on all the things I have done in these 11 months, there's still a month to go until I move to London to start a new adventure and who knows what could happen in that month? You know, when I started this year out I spent days regretting my decision, crying because I'd chickened out of moving to London and I deferred my university place but now I'm looking back at it all I shouldn't regret a thing. I've done so much! I've grown as a person in some ways and that's cool.
My year out started a few days after A-level results day, I started it by going to London and trying to meet One Direction at their movie premiere and that was the biggest fail of a day, EVER. Screw that day (I'm still very bitter) but then a few days after I had the best weekend of my life at Reading festival and I can't wait to end this year out the exact same way next month!
I then got a job in September, one which I was very reluctant to start as my social anxiety had finally taken a back seat and I wasn't prepared to let it come back but oh, it did. I only lasted a week and I had already cried in front of strangers like a baby because I couldn't handle the job of working at a counter having to 'speak up' to people…I tried my best but the anxiety won and I was already defeated before I had even started. This year was meant to be a learning curve, get over all my problems but that knocked me straight away. After that I spent weeks being angry at my own mind for failing me once again but it all changed when a certain Aussie band came back to the UK and many little London adventures began.
I can't even tell you the amount of times I have travelled to London this year for 5 Seconds of Summer, they've been the primary focus of this gap year, they've been the reason I've travelled to many places this year and that's just super cool.
So like I said the whole social anxiety thing was a problem I just HAD to overcome if I was ever going to be slightly confident to fly the nest this year, so I took on that challenge head first and here I am - a girl who has travelled all the way to Sheffield on her own, all the way to London and all the way to Reading. That is really an achievement I am proud of because a year ago just getting on a bus scared the shit out of me but now I can do all of that with about 15% anxiety levels rather than about 34986945%. Well done, me!
This year I have met loads of people, made loads of new friends who are already based in London who I'll be able to hang out with all the time once September comes.
Okay, so I might not have got a job but I tried (it's just not as easy as you'd hope it would be) but I've spent this year with my mum, most days I've been at home being there for her and her for me and it's going to be the hardest thing ever leaving her in September.
Of course I kinda wish I'd had the money to go travelling around the world in this gap year like most people but I didn't, simple as that, I used money from selling things and the little bit of help from my wonderful parents to just have fun here in the UK and I am happy with that because I've had one of the funnest years of my life.
You don't NEED to go out and travel the world on your gap year, you can just simply have a break from education. We've all been there since the age of 3/4, aren't we entitled to a little break? I think we are. So if you're off to uni in the near future and you want a year out then do it, and have fun!
My little journey to London starts soon and I will never forget this year of my life because it's been an amazing adventure! x
